The Chosen One Is When You Pick Yourself

kaitlyn terrell
May 28
4 min read

It’s been a few days since I wrote a new blog post—and I apologize for my absence. Honestly, I get so caught up in being present with life, flowing through my days, soaking it all in, that I forget to pause and write about what I’m experiencing.

I’ve been on a little break from art journalist events, but I know the next one is being prepared for me by the universe. So we wait. Patiently.

But until then… do you know who Tim Morrison is? No? Ok good—lol—time to get familiar. Check out my blog post about him [insert link here].

Ever done a two-week meditation session? No? Ha, me either… until recently. And whew. You need to hear this story. [Insert link here.]

The Mantra That’s Been Singing My Soul

There’s this one song I’ve had on repeat lately that completely embodies what I’m experiencing—It’s called “I Release Control” by Alexa Sunshine Rose.

The mantra plays in my mind, not just as lyrics, but as something deeper. Like… it’s menstruating through my cells.

"I release control and surrender to the flow of love that will heal me."

That word—surrender—She’s been chasing me through every life lesson, whispering through breakdowns, appearing in the mirrors I refused to look in.

But something shifted. I finally turned around to face her.

And what happened?

I was embraced.

Not dragged.

Not punished.

Not torn apart.

I was held… in a hug I didn’t even know I needed.

Back to the Real Reason I’m Here…

Okay, okay. I got distracted. A girl loves to promote herself—is that a crime? Haha jk jk. Or maybe not 👀

Let’s get serious though.

So… what if I told you a place is calling my name? Like, really calling me. Like spiritual-soul-gut-pull-type-calling.

I talked more in-depth about it in my life update YouTube video [insert link here], but I’ll give you a taste:

It’s Austin, Texas.

Yup. Out of all the places I’ve been (including out of the country), nothing felt like home. Austin is giving full-on "You" vibes—you know, that TV show with Joe? Yeah. Him. Except I didn’t do anything for it to fall in love with me. I just… showed up.

I think it happened the moment I smiled. Or maybe it was my loud a$$ laugh. That would make any man run toward the sirens, let’s be real.

But Austin? it’s been hooked since Day One. I’ve visited twice and my heart’s been locked in ever since.

It’s not home… but it’s the clearest sign I’ve ever received. It’s the next level of my spiritual journey.

If déjà vu and That’s So Raven had a baby—that would be my experience in Texas. Like I’ve been there before… but it wasn’t me… but it was me… and also not that place… but exactly that place. Confused? You had to be there.

I’ve Got $150 and a Whole Lotta Faith

Right now, I’ve got about $150 to my name—but my faith? Limitless. I know I’ll be moving soon.

Because to be a soul on this journey… its simply a feeling I cant explain.

Not only is my external world shifting, but my internal one is being rewritten. And the colors—oh, the colors—I’m seeing shades I’ve never seen before.

I look down and my hand is gripping the paintbrush, dripping with something new. My chest rises and falls, my knees shake, and I realize—I’m the one creating the colors.

A beam of light moves through me, and everything inside is changing.

Dipped in new paint.

My eyes can hardly see through the tears.

It’s not just beautiful.

It’s a world I haven’t even had the privilege to describe yet.

My Raven moment is kicking in, and the vision is coming fast.

The Kind of Deep That Doesn’t Look Like Healing

You know it’s real when you spend hours digging through your own core like kinetic sand. I’ve been pulling truth from the seams of this body I call human. And as the sand slips through my fingers, I know: None of it is meant to stay attached.

I’m doing the kind of soul work that doesn’t look like healing on the outside.

It’s messy.

It’s wild.

But It’s sacred.

And yet—That’s where the real softness shows up. Not in the stillness, but in the surrender. In the way I let go enough for the truth to pour out of me like watercolor on skin.

Sorry, the poet in me had to go deep for a sec. Y’all know I can’t do basic writing lol. Gotta make it fun, right?